Terrorist are radicals bad guys who want to make their voices heard by any means, they represent a serious threat and sometimes…. well, they are pretty childish like making backflip (source) as if it were a way to show their badassery in the terrorism field. Anyway since there are several reports that sustain poverty as one of the factors that generate terrorrism. We decide to poke some fun of it and show why al-qaeda would never succeed in Haiti. Here are three major issues for their success, I hope you have a little sense of humor left :
1- We Would Miss the Flight
This one must be the biggest challenge for the haitian-Terrorist-wanna-be. We like being late…i mean we love being late. From top to bottom the situation is not so different, the CEP made journalists wait more than 3hours before to make their results public, Our beloved President Michel J. Martelly came late for the inauguration and Yeah, media cannot complain, because when broadcasting live they respect RARELY their schedule.
2- The Airlines company Maybe would not show up !
Everybody knows how the customer service of these airline is so different in Haiti from the standard observed overseas, but do you remember guys the days when this airline was cancelling flights over and over for vile excuses recently like that one: "Des dizaines de passagers abandonnés à l’aéroport de Port-au-Prince"
3- The plan would change when it comes to take action
To illustrate this, let’s take that as an example : when Martelly became the 56th president of Haiti, INITE declared they are not seeking for administration office, then when they see that Martelly asked for an outsider to be prime minister, they were like « F*** You, you really don’t think that we were serious, do you ? » as a matter of fact, Now they are out begging for public office, some, 4 out of the 18 available, others Half and Half. Now to relate the fact with our topic, maybe up in the air they (Our wanna-be-terrorists) would be like « I fly the plane, You stay with the hostages », « No I fly » and back and forth.